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Sunday, July 1, 2012

The giant chameleon.....

The giant chameleon....

Moving out...

Moving out.....

Top 20 to 40 of the Top 100 one-liners.......


TOP 100 funniest one-liners on the internet!

21
Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity.
4395
5894
1499
22
If sex is a pain in the ass, then you're doing it wrong...
3716
5738
2022
23
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
3703
4522
819
24
If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.
3499
4676
1177
25
If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... does that mean that one enjoys it?
3475
4830
1355
26
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.
3404
4444
1040
27
Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.
3403
4296
893
28
How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?
3329
4190
861
29
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..
3314
4795
1481
30
Some people are like Slinkies ... not really good for anything, but you can't help smiling when you see one tumble down the stairs.
3178
4283
1105
31
Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish?
3071
4097
1026
32
A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don't need it.
3021
3891
870
33
I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
2992
4066
1074
34
Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
2958
4080
1122
35
Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says "If an emergency, notify:" I put "DOCTOR". What's my mother going to do?
2938
3709
771
36
I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian
2866
4184
1318
37
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
2842
4035
1193
38
I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
2768
3537
769
39
I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it...so I said "Implants?"
2710
4100
1390
40
The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.
2615
3525
910

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